Session 2: What Has Gone Wrong?
Disordered Desire, Control, and False Trust
Desire itself is not the problem. Within Christian theology, desire is part of creaturely life. Hunger, longing, and the need for care are not failures—they are part of what it means to be human.
Yet when fear, shame, or anxiety take hold, good desires can become disordered. They can be elevated beyond their proper place and made to carry more than they were meant to hold.
In this way, control over the body can begin to function as a source of safety, identity, or worth. What begins as a desire for health, beauty, or stability can become something we rely on for meaning or security.
Disordered eating, then, is not only behavioral, but theological. It raises the question: what do we trust to sustain us?
Catechism
Q: What is disordered eating?
A: It is when good, God given, desires for nourishment, beauty, or safety become distorted and controlling.
Q: Why do I seek control over my body?
A: I seek control over my body because I am currently loving in a fallen world, longing for safety, identity and peace. When life feels uncertain, the body can seem like the one place I can manage, measure, and master.
Beneath this desire is something deeper, and beautifully tender: A longing to feel secure, to be known and accepted, and to find peace.
Scripture teaches these are not bad longings. The Gospel just re-directs this desire to its proper end. I do not need to secure myself, because my life is already held in Christ. True peace is found in belonging–body and soul– to the One who sustains me.
Q: What is an idol in relation to the body?
A: Anything I trust more than God for worth, safety, or identity.
Q: What do I hope my body will secure for me?
A: I often hope my body will give me acceptance, control, or peace, but it cannot carry that weight.
Reflection
Complete the sentence:
“If I could control my body, then I would finally feel…”
What do you most hope your body will secure for you?
Scripture
Matthew 6:25-34: 25 “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? 26 Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? 27 And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? 28 And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, 29 yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 30 But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31 Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. 33 But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. 34 “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.”
Col 3:1-3: 1“If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. 2 Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. 3 For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God.”
Theological Insight
As taught by Martin Luther, whatever the heart trusts most becomes its "god." This concept continues to shape theological understanding of idolatry (see Noll, Confessions and Catechisms). When control over the body becomes something we rely on for worth or safety, it can take on this role.
Theological traditions both before and during the Reformation described sin not only as wrongdoing, but as disordered desire: misdirected love or trust (see Oberman; McGrath, Reformation Thought). They emphasized, further, that sin is not only the outward behavior. It includes internally turning toward created things to provide only what God can give. At its core, the issue is about reliance upon things apart from God alone.
Practice
Write down one fear or anxiety that drives your desire for control.
Then gently consider: What might it look like to bring this fear before God, rather than trying to solve it through control?
Prayerfully ask God to reveal to you the roots driving your desire for control, and invite Him to reveal to you a new way of being in surrender and trust. Spend time in meditation– not doing work, not trying to earn or fix anything– just simply being in the presence of your very good Father who loves you just as you are, who is pleased with you, and who looks upon you with the righteousness of Christ.